In an excerpt from her new memoir, the 'Selfish' singer opens up that when she was at 'the beginning of some of the darkest years' of her life, she felt like she was her own worst enemy.
- Apr 19, 2023
AceShowbiz - Madison Beer considered her suicidal thoughts to be "normal" at the age of 16. When recalling that she contemplated suicide as a teenager, the 24-year-old singer revealed that at the time, she didn't consider her suicidal thoughts to be unusual.
The "Selfish" singer explained in an excerpt from her new memoir, "The Half of It", which has been shared with PEOPLE, "I felt like I was my own worst enemy. I retreated more and more into myself, and it was the beginning of some of the darkest years of my life, starting at age sixteen and following me into my twenties."
"There were many times - just like the night my nudes were leaked - that I felt so backed into a corner I thought the only way out was to end my life," she continued. "Once, on a particularly heavy day, I climbed over the edge of my balcony in Los Angeles and stood there, a million thoughts running through my head as I stared down at the ground, my eyes going in and out of focus."
"I don't think I would have jumped," she, however, assured. "It was more about knowing that I could - that I had a way out if it became too much."
Madison often had suicidal thoughts at the age of 16. However, her little brother managed to convince her to step back from the edge of the balcony. She said, "My little brother found me and screamed for my parents."
"And as I climbed back over, listening to them all freak out, I was only confused why they were making such a big deal out of it," she went on to recount. "The thought of killing myself was so normal to me at that point that I had forgotten it wasn't something everyone pondered on a daily basis."
