AceShowbiz - Demi Lovato is opening up about being a child star and how it affected their family dynamics. In a new episode of her "4D with Demi Lovato" podcast on Wednesday, June 2, Demi and guest Drew Barrymore revisited their childhood stardom and talked about growing in the public eye.
"I noticed that when I came into the spotlight at a young age, and then was the breadwinner," Demi shared. "There wasn't a manual for my parents to read and it say, 'Here's what to do to raise a child star.' They didn't get that."
The "Sober" singer, who came out as non-binary earlier this year, went on to say, "So when they would try to ground me at 17, I would say, 'I pay the bills.' And I cringe now when I think about that attitude. But when the world is putting you on a pedestal, you kind of think that you could do no wrong. As I've gotten older, I see my parents just as big kids themselves."
In relation to the topic, Drew admitted that she could relate with Demi. Offering her perspective, the "50 First Dates" actress said, "I don't think it's the world and the pedestal. I think it's the parent-child dynamic that gets completely reversed."
She added, "And, no wonder you won't take an order from an authority figure who's no longer an authority figure because you've now reduced them down with finances and responsibilities." The mom of two then shared becoming a mom made her realize "how little I understood what boundaries were."
"When you're a parent, you try to compensate with so much love and you're almost afraid to get into the argument," "The Drew Barrymore Show" host told Demi. "Sometimes, you're just trying to survive the day, so you let things slide, and then you're like, 'There should've been a boundary in that place probably a while ago, but I guess I'm only realizing that now.' "
"I didn't know I was angry at my mom. I didn't know I resented her," Drew added. "I also then felt so much guilt as if my inability to make a relationship with this woman work was literally the most cruel and f***ed thing I'd ever done in my life."
She continued, "I, for 20 or 30 years, felt toxic inside that I had to keep separating myself from her to gain autonomy and a structure and boundaries...and learn everything on my own. I realized that her and I were friends. We were not parent and child. Therefore, I had to completely relearn what [the] parent-child dynamic is. I couldn't have a relationship with her until I figured that out for myself, and could come to her as a woman."