In a new video featured on FunnyOrDie.com, Lindsay Lohan calls herself an alcoholic "as well as a threat to all security guards if they work at hotels."
- Apr 15, 2009
AceShowbiz - Becoming the latest Hollywood celeb featured on eHarmony profile spoof on FunnyOrDie.com, Lindsay Lohan is videotaped poking fun at herself. She makes fun of her new single status after breaking up with Samantha Ronson recently and also of the troubled actress status that many people address her as.
"I'm looking for someone who I can spend the rest of my life with - or at least the rest of my probation with," Lindsay is quoted as saying in the more-than-one minute video. "I'm an actress, a singer, an entrepreneur, and I have single-handedly kept 90 percent of all gossip Web sites in business."
"I'm a workaholic, a shopaholic and, according to the state of California, an alcoholic, as well as a threat to all security guards if they work at hotels," she continues saying. "And to put all those rumors to rest, I am not broke. I actually have over $400 in the bank and 20,000 Marlboro Miles, which I'm very proud of."
Lindsay, as she herself says in the video, is looking for someone "who likes a night out on the town (as long as he or she is driving), ankle monitoring bracelets and doesn't have family members quick to issue restraining orders." Additionally, she describes her dream date as "long walks on the beach, car chases on the PCH, antiquing and passing out in Cadillac Escalades."
