The 'Without Me' singer remembers avoiding to look at herself in the mirror for months as she 'felt really f**king ugly' during her hardest struggle with illness.
- September 6, 2024
AceShowbiz - Halsey, who uses the pronouns "she/they," has revealed the devastating impact of her illness on her self-image. In June, she disclosed their diagnosis with systemic lupus erythematosus (SLE) and T-cell lymphoproliferative disorder.
At the height of her illness, Halsey couldn't bear to look at herself. "I just felt really f**king ugly the whole time I was sick," she said in a recent interview with Paper magazine. "I couldn't look at myself. I didn't look in a mirror for months."
Her struggles are reflected in her recent singles, "The End" and "Lucky." In "The End," she sing of doctors' diagnoses and debilitating pain. In "Lucky," shemention shaving her head as a result of her illness.
Amid the challenges, Halsey found solace in an unexpected hobby: miniature doll-housing. "Sitting there and playing with these beautiful tiny [doll houses] was so much nicer than facing reality," she shared. It provided her with a creative outlet that was quiet and accessible during homebound periods.
The hobby also helped Halsey regain their motor skills, which had been impaired by her illness. "When I was sick, I couldn't even open an envelope," she said. "Miniature doll-housing required me to be focused and meticulous."
Halsey's passion for doll-housing extended beyond crafting miniature furniture and wallpaper. She also built parallel worlds in these tiny spaces, reflecting their desire for companionship during her solitary illness. "I really didn't want to be on my own," Halsey admitted.
Lupus is a chronic autoimmune disease that attacks healthy tissue, while T-cell lymphoproliferative disorder affects the production of lymphocytes, white blood cells that fight infection.
Halsey's forthcoming album, "The Great Impersonator," is set to be released on October 25.