AceShowbiz - Ed Sheeran will leave a posthumous album in his will. The "Bad Habits" hitmaker has opened up he is going to continue adding songs to his final record, which will be released once he's left this world.
"I want to slowly make this album that is quote-unquote 'perfect' for the rest of my life, adding songs here and there. And just have it in my will that after I die, it comes out," he said to Rolling Stone magazine.
The 32-year-old pop megastar made the admission as he spoke for the first time about having suicidal thoughts following the deaths of his best friends Jamal Edwards and Shane Warne within weeks of each other.
"The A-Team" singer was left devastated by the February 2022 passing of music producer Jamal - the son of 'Loose Women' star Brenda Edwards - who died after a cardiac arrest brought on by cocaine and alcohol, and has now said the death a month later of his cricketer pal Shane aged 52 left him feeling like he was "drowning" in his life-long fight with depression.
The dad-of-two - who has daughters Lyra, two, and 10-month-old Jupiter with his 30-year-old wife Cherry Seaborn - also told Rolling Stone about how he developed an eating disorder as he compared himself to toned pop stars such as Justin Bieber.
He told the publication, "My best friend died. And he shouldn't have done. I've always had real lows in my life. But it wasn't really till last year that I actually addressed it. I felt like I didn't want to live anymore. And I have had that throughout my life.… you're under the waves drowning. You're just sort of in this thing. And you can't get out of it."
Ed added being depressed made him feel "selfish" as a father. He said about seeking help, "No one really talks about their feelings where I come from. People think it's weird getting a therapist in England.... I think it's very helpful to be able to speak with someone and just vent and not feel guilty about venting. The help isn't a button that is pressed, where you're automatically OK. It is something that will always be there and just has to be managed."
The pop star said he struggled with his body image after collaborating with the likes of Justin and Shawn Mendes and admitted he started "gorging" on food before vomiting it up. He added, "I'm self-conscious anyway, but you get into an industry where you're getting compared to every other pop star."
"I was in the One Direction wave, and I'm like, 'Well, why don't I have a six-pack?' And I was like, 'Oh because you love kebabs and drink beer.' Then you do songs with Justin Bieber and Shawn Mendes. All these people have fantastic figures."
"And I was always like, 'Well, why am I so… fat?' So I found myself doing what Elton (John) talks about in his book - gorging, and then it would come up again. I have a real eating problem. I'm a real binge eater. I'm a binge-everything. But I'm now more of a binge exerciser, and a binge dad. And work, obviously."