AceShowbiz - Meghan McCain got candid about the reason of her departure from "The View" in her new memoir, "Bad Republican". In the book, Meghan described the work enviroment at the morning talk show as "toxic," before detailing a fight with her former co-host Joy Behar which was triggering her postpartum anxiety.
"The way I'd been treated on the show as the resident conservative, particularly upon my return from maternity leave, had made it impossible for me to stay," Meghan wrote in the book, according to an excerpt obtained by Variety. "There's stuff that happens on 'The View' that shouldn't be allowed," she said, adding that the show "brings out the worst in people."
The daughter of late Sen. John McCain continued, "I believe that all the women and the staff are working under conditions where the culture is so f***ked up, it feels like quicksand." Meghan also called out network ABC for failing to "lay down the law when it comes to conduct," alleging that "HR reports seem to fall on deaf ears."
"In my four years there, I was the target of plenty of shade -- too much to even begin to recount -- and then I also experienced more toxic, direct and purposeful hostility," Meghan went on to note. Of former co-host Whoopi Goldberg, she said, "She had made a promise to my father that she would look after me, and she kept her word for the first two years that I was on the show. The thing about Whoopi, though, is that she yields so much power in culture and television, and once she turns on you, it can create unfathomable tension at the table."
"I found her open disdain for me more and more difficult to manage as the years went on and it became more frequent," she added, noting that it "left a scar on our relationship" when Whoopi told her to "stop talking" in one moment.
"You can't imagine how it messes with your self-esteem working in an environment where the worst thing you can be in the world is a Republican during the [Donald Trump] years. As the country got worse under Trump, the treatment from Whoopi, Joy and some of the staff grew meaner and less forgiving," Meghan continued, believing that she was "often being punished and singled out for being a conservative" on the show.
"I'd hear a lot of complaints that the staff, including the other co-hosts and producers, had problems with my 'personality.' Until I got pregnant, I could handle it and manage it. No matter how hard the days were, I accepted the tradeoff," she said. However, things got worse after she gave birth to her first child Liberty in September 2020 as she suffered from severe postpartum anxiety.
Meghan then recalled an on-air disagreement in January with Joy during her second day back from maternity leave where Joy told her that she didn't miss Meghan following the break. "Joy and I began squabbling a bit about the state of the Democratic Party on air. To make light of things and to ease the tension, I said, 'Joy, you missed me so much when I was on maternity leave! You missed fighting with me!' " Meghan wrote.
Meghan shared that she was "uncontrollable sobbing" during the commercial break. "Nothing anyone has ever said to me on camera since I have been giving interviews since I was 22 years old ever hit this hard. I was super hormonal and deeply hurt," she admitted.
"That experience of crying and leaking and trying to pull it together in seconds so I could go back on-air with women who appeared to hate me was an intensely heartbreaking experience. I can't explain it further other than I felt like in that moment I took a look at my life outside of myself and I thought clearly -- this s**t isn't worth this," Meghan penned.
She added, "While I wept, I no longer felt safe working at The View. It is one of the most singular feelings of loneliness and anguish I have felt in my entire life. It was a perfect storm of hormones, postpartum anxiety and a lot of demons. I never talked to Joy one on one again after that day."