AceShowbiz - Cancer-stricken British pop star Sarah Harding can no longer bear to look at herself in the mirror after undergoing a mastectomy.
The Girls Aloud hitmaker had to have one breast removed in her fight with the disease, which has since spread to other parts of her body following her initial diagnosis last summer (2020), and she admits the health crisis has left her unable to recognize herself.
She shared, "Now there's just a bunch of stitches where my breast used to be. As much as I know it had to happen and I want to be brave, I can't look at myself in the mirror any more. I can't face it."
"On top of everything else, I just don't look like me any more. I don't recognize myself. It's very hard to wake up every morning knowing that a part of me is missing; that part of my womanhood is gone. The loss of it breaks my heart. Some women can have reconstruction, but I know I'd just end up back in intensive care because I'm too ill. I suppose it had crossed my mind at one point, the idea of reconstruction, but now I have to be realistic. I have to let go."
The singer, who was warned Christmas 2020 would likely be her last, recalls waking up in a screaming fit after the operation.
In an excerpt from her memoir, "Hear Me Out", published by Britain's The Times, she explained, "Coming round from that operation was one of the worst moments of my life. I'm so grateful that Mum was there waiting for me because when I woke up I screamed the place down."
Sarah, who is said to have delayed seeking a medical consultation last year due to the COVID-19 pandemic, has constantly been inundated with well wishes from fans online, and she is grateful for the support.
The 39-year-old star posted online, "Hi everyone. Thank you so much for all the messages of love and support that I've received since my last post. Everyone has been so kind and reading your comments and DMs [direct messages] has been such a huge source of strength to me. I can't deny that things are tough right now but I'm fighting as hard as I possibly can and being as brave as I know how [sic]."