AceShowbiz - Kristen Stewart has openly talked about how fame affected her personal life. In a feature piece for InStyle magazine's November issue, the Bella Swan of the "Twilight" film series sat down with "Happiest Season" director Clea Duvall, and candidly described public attention over her relationships as "thievery."
Asked if she was drawn to the LGBT movie because of her own experience, the 30-year-old shared, "The first time I ever dated a girl, I was immediately being asked if I was a lesbian. And it's like, 'God, I'm 21 years old.' " She elaborated, "I felt like maybe there were things that have hurt people I've been with. Not because I felt ashamed of being openly gay but because I didn't like giving myself to the public, in a way. It felt like such thievery."
The "Charlie's Angels" star, who is currently dating screenwriter Dylan Meyer, admitted that her stardom led her to become "cagey" when it came to romance. She went on to explain, "Even in my previous relationships, which were straight, we did everything we could not to be photographed doing things, things that would become not ours."
"So I think the added pressure of representing a group of people, of representing queerness, wasn't something I understood then. Only now can I see it," the ex-girlfriend of Robert Pattinson continued. "Back then I would have been like, 'No, I'm fine. My parents are fine with it. Everything's fine.' That's bulls**t. It's been hard. It's been weird. It's that way for everyone."
On whether she felt there was an expectation for her to be a spokesperson for the LGBTQ community, Kristen admitted, "I did more when I was younger, when I was being hounded about labeling myself." She added, "I had no reticence about displaying who I was. I was going out every day knowing I'd be photographed while I was being affectionate with my girlfriend, but I didn't want to talk about it."
"I did feel an enormous pressure, but it wasn't put on me by the [LGBTQIA+] community," she pressed on. "People were seeing those pictures and reading these articles and going, 'Oh, well, I need to be shown.' I was a kid, and I felt personally affronted. Now I relish it. I love the idea that anything I do with ease rubs off on somebody who is struggling. That s**t's dope! When I see a little kid clearly feeling themselves in a way that they wouldn't have when I grew up, it makes me skip."
Elsewhere in the interview, Kristen also opened up about her decision to stay away from social media. "It's just not natural to me. It's never been a question," she explained when inquired whether she was making a conscious decision over it. "I've never been like, 'Should I do it?' It's literally just been like, 'No, my god.' "