AceShowbiz - Demi Lovato wants the world to know who she really is. The "Stone Cold" singer's documentary entitled "Demi Lovato: Simply Complicated" was released on YouTube on October 17. She revealed many things in it, including her drug addiction and how she managed to break free from it.
Her drug addiction began when she tried to find a way to fit in after being bullied for years at school. That was when a popular student forced the singer to go partying, leading her to drink alcohol and smoke marijuana for the first time. She tried cocaine for the first time when she was working on Disney Channel. She was 17 at that time.
"My first time doing coke, I was 17 working on Disney Channel, and I was with a couple of friends and they introduced me to it," the "Sonny with a Chance" star confessed. "I was scared because my mom always told me that your heart could burst if you do it. But I did it anyways and I loved it. I felt out of control with the coke the first time that I did it."
Demi then added that her biological father might be the reason why she did it. "My dad was an addict and an alcoholic," she said. "I guess I always searched for what he found in drugs and alcohol because it fulfilled him and he chose that over a family."
Nick Jonas, who appeared in the documentary, disclosed that Demi's addiction turned her relationship with his brother Joe Jonas complicated. "I was playing the bridge.... It became really good between she and I for a while, growing closer than we've ever been," he said. "I remember thinking in my head I felt a bit of pride about it, like selfishly maybe I was helping her back to being the Demi we know and love. 'She's not going to do anything crazy. She'll be fine.' "
At the age of 18, Demi entered rehab for the first time. However, the singer confessed that she wasn't working her program and still used drugs. "I wasn't working my program. I wasn't ready to get sober. I was sneaking it on planes, sneaking it in bathrooms, sneaking it throughout the night," she recalled. "Nobody knew."
Her manager John Taylor revealed that Demi once promoted sobriety while high. "We were in New York and it was clear that she was on something," he said. "She was on air promoting this new way of life. I was like, 'You're so full of it.' "
Demi's addiction only got worse when she was hospitalized. Her specialist Mike Bayer disclosed, "The nurse is checking her in. The bottle of pills is there. She grabs the pills, she then downs all the other pills and says, 'You f**king b***h, if I just tried to kill myself, why would you give me access to pills?' " The incident made her go into a psych ward, but it still didn't turn out any better for her.
Her management couldn't handle it anymore, so they threatened to fire her if she didn't get sober. Mike ordered her to smash her phone, which was the source of all the negative influences, and she did it. She even dunked it in the water when John told her to do so. "It was the beginning of the process of surrendering," Demi claimed.
The "Cool for the Summer" singer then revealed that she spent her first year of sobriety being a judge on "The X Factor (US)". She was 19 at that time. Mike said, "While she's a judge, she's living in a sober apartment, with roommates. She's having to do chores. She has no cell phone, she is completely and totally submitted to the process of recovery."
Demi also added, "You have to really lean in to the people who are trying to support you. You really have to surrender because that's when the change is going to happen."
The 78-minute documentary also reveals many things about the singer, including the fact that she is still battling her eating disorder and her sexuality. Demi confessed, "Food is still the biggest challenge in my life. I don't wanna give it the power to say that it controls my every thought, but it's something I'm constantly thinking about."
The singer also revealed that she didn't care about gender when it came to love. "I am open to human connection, so whether that's through a male or female, it doesn't matter to me," she said.