The frontwoman of Florence + The Machine reveals in a new interview that she felt that she didn't 'deserve to eat' and 'to feel comfortable' when she struggled with eating disorder.
- May 11, 2022
AceShowbiz - Florence Welch felt she didn't "deserve" to eat when she was in the grip of anorexia. The frontwoman of Florence + The Machine has spoken in the past about her struggle with the eating disorder and although she has largely overcome her issues, she still has the same mindset towards food.
The musician told the June/July issue of Rolling Stone magazine when asked if she is happy, "I think part of it is long-term recovery from eating disorders. So much of that is rejecting nourishment - 'I don't deserve to eat, I don't deserve to feel comfortable.' Anorexic thinking is still part of my life, even though the anorexia itself isn't."
Florence added she has also starved herself of love. She recalled, "And so, with emotional intimacy, which is kind of like being fed, sometimes you can be like, 'No, that's too much, I don't need it… actual intimacy, actual commitment? I really struggle with it."
"You can spend your whole life craving love, and when someone gives you real wholesome love, loving the real you, you're like, 'Why would you do that? I'm disgusting!' " she added.
The "Shake It Out" hitmaker previously admitted it was a "miracle" lockdown didn't push her back into anorexia. "I really f****** empathise with anyone who did relapse in those two years because I think it was probably the closest I’ve ever thought about it," she claimed at the time.
"There were moments when I was like, 'Should I be starting to cut back on my sugar? Or should I do a cleanse?' And that for me is just a slippery slope," the musician added.
Florence has battled anxiety almost her whole life and struggled with anorexia as a teenager, with her conditioning worsening when she found global fame. But she admitted her family didn't know about her problems until they heard her 2018 track "Hunger". She revealed, "It opened up a lot of stuff in my family that was good in the end." She added, "It's very hard to accept love. If you've been denying yourself nourishment in some way, you also have a tendency to deny yourself emotional nourishment."