At South Park Elementary, Cartman rants at length over the results of the students' annual school physicals, thinking that teachers have posted a list of all the boys' penis sizes in the hall for everyone to see. Believing the results to be inaccurate (especially since he is at the bottom of the list), he measures every boy's penis and posts his own findings in the hall. He is soon called to Principal Victoria's office, where he learns that the first list actually showed how much every student had grown in height since the previous year's physical. To make matters worse, Cartman has found that his penis really is the smallest of all the boys in the school. At a consultation session with a psychiatrist, Cartman is tested to see how he deals with anger. While initially showing no emotion during the session when the psychiatrist tries to incite him into anger with fat jokes, Cartman silently uses an iPhone to send fake chat logs and a fake police report that indicate the psychiatrist was involved in an affair with a 14-year-old over the internet. The psychiatrist's wife is notified, calling her husband before committing suicide over the phone. Cartman then sternly replies to the psychiatrist by stating that he is not fat, just big-boned.
STAR
LEAD
LEAD
SUPPORT
SUPPORT
SUPPORT
A father takes an irreverent and honest approach to parenting and relationships.
Iraq war veteran Rayshawn takes shelter in his apartment building after being set up by New Orleans police on a drug dea...
Executive editor and host Zainab Salbi goes beyond the headlines about sexual harassment to ask how we got here and how ...
$#*! MY DAD SAYS, based on the popular Twitter feed by Justin Halpern, stars Emmy Award winner William Shatner as Ed Goo...
The misadventures of hapless cafe owner René Artois and his escapades with the Resistance in occupied France.
"'Til Death" is a comedy about long-married couple Eddie (Brad Garrett) and Joy Stark (Joely Fisher), who are closing in...
Spider-Man: Brand New Day wins major award, boosting its 2026 success with 89% critics' and 98% audience scores. A landmark win for the franchise.
1 hour ago
Eva Green and Samuel L. Jackson ignite the screen in *Just Play Dead*—a thriller of faked deaths, betrayal, and dark humor. Watch the new trailer now.
2 days ago
Ella Langley's "Choosin' Texas" hits #1 on the Billboard Hot 100. See how the cinematic music video fueled its rise with Americana visuals and streaming domi...
2 days ago
Terminator 2 wins a major new award decades after release, celebrating its groundbreaking legacy and reaffirming its status as a timeless cinematic masterpiece.
2 days ago
Gwyneth Paltrow has postponed a private dinner originally planned to celebrate Sam Altman, the CEO of OpenAI, at her Hamptons residence, Daily Mail reports.
2 days ago