Happy Endings Episode 1.02 The Quicksand Girlfriend

Dave picks up Andrea in a bar. The girl is totally into him. She even likes his reenactment of the first scene of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. It's probably the weakest of the four Raiders flicks, so we're impressed she's impressed. Dave's not ready for a relationship, so this super-hot lady is perfect for him-even if she does like wearing a fedora in bed.

As much as Dave would like to keep things casual, he finds himself doing all sorts of relationship-y stuff with Andrea. Brad says he's stuck in chicksand. That's like quicksand except Brad replaced the "quick" with "chick." Get it? Yeah, neither does Max. As far as Dave's situation, he finds himself smack-dab in the middle of a serious relationship. Uh oh.

The more Dave tries to get out, the faster he gets pulled back in. Ah…Chicksand! Dave's doing things like exchanging pet names and meeting Andrea's entire family during her big birthday bash. This includes Grandma Nellie, who likes to boop his nose just like Andrea. Then it happens. Andrea gets a call letting her know she's going on tour with Ke$ha. Dave's out! Then Andrea gets leveled by a speeding bike messenger. BAM! Dave's back in!

Alex is on the hunt for a new roommate. This worries Jane, who knows her sis isn't the best judge of character. Judging people comes easy for Jane, so she lines up gobs of possible roommate choices. She invites her top-10 candidates over for an open house. Alex doesn't have anything in common with any of the ladies her sis lines up. She goes out on her own to pick a friendly lady named Samantha.

Alex thinks her new redheaded roomie is awesome until Jane lets her know that she's been secretly videoing her for a website called SmokingHotRoomies.com. This explains why Samantha wanted to eat popsicles and have a cream cheese fight the other day.

Penny is desperate to find a pretend gay husband, so Max introduces her to his flamboyant friend Derrick. Penny says, "He's the gay of my dreams." Hey, the heart wants what the heart wants. Things are fab at first until Penny realizes Derrick is a bit of a tool. That's fine. This group already has an offensively stereotypical gay guy in their midst. Her name is Penny.

When we last left Dave, he was drowning in chicksand. The only way to truly cut all ties with Andrea is to have "the talk." He starts off strong, then…RING! Andrea gets a call. Grandma Nellie is dead! Now, a funeral is not the ideal place to have an awkward breakup conversation, but that's where it all goes down. Turns out Andrea wants out, too. Guess she felt like she was stuck in Dave-sand. Yeah, we know. Chicksand is better.