Leslie, after a few glasses of wine, had purchased way too many flowers for Ron after his hernia surgery. Now everyone in the office must pitch in 90 dollars! Not only will Ron be getting flowers for his hernia recovery, everyone in the office will also be getting some. Oh goody! More importantly, Leslie tells everyone that she will be a judge in the Miss Pawnee Beauty Pageant! Tom can't believe it. Leslie assures April that judging the Miss Pawnee Beauty Pageant is a serious job and only those who have "talent and poise" will be there. Tom perks up when he hears this: apparently the girls from "Talent and Poise" are strippers. Leslie scoffs and walks away in disgust. That is NOT what Miss Pawnee is about!
April cheerfully brings Leslie a huge iced mocha with extra whipped cream and slyly tells Leslie that she will be entering the Miss Pawnee pageant. Leslie is so happy that April, who is not "classically hot," can have a chance at the title. Unbeknownst to Leslie, April is only joining the pageant for the 600-dollar prize. When April learns that Leslie won't vote for her, April asks for the seven dollars it cost for the mocha.
Tom uses his "connections" to get a spot on the judging panel for the beauty pageant. Meanwhile, Officer Dave Sanderson comes to visit Leslie at work. Leslie walks him through the Pawnee mural's history. Its pretty obvious Dave really likes Leslie. Dave asks Leslie out for coffee, and she says yes, but when he asks if Madeline Albright is her grandmother, Leslie has second thoughts. Poor Dave is rejected and walks away sad.
Leslie and Ann have some girl talk at lunch. The topic: Dave doesn't know women in government! Leslie doesn't know if she can date someone who doesn't share her interests, but Ann has never dated anyone who loved doing nurse stuff, like giving vaccinations. Speaking of dates, after lunch Ann asks Mark to fix her shower. Mark agrees and in return Ann offers to cook a cheap meal. Looks like Mark and Ann have a second date planned! Some might say, "The weirdest second date ever."
Leslie and Tom arrive at the pageant and meet the other judges: Jessica Wix, a former Miss Pawnee; Ray Holstead, deli owner; and Charles Healy, who has judged every single Miss Pawnee pageant. Leslie trusts that they all will judge truly and honestly and pick the most intelligent and forward-thinking woman for the crown. When Leslie turns to Tom for support, Tom impresses some of the contestants by naming their bra sizes. Tom is going to rock this pageant!
Its time for the pageant to begin! The contestants take the stage! The women are dressed in their beautiful dresses. First up is April, who awkwardly introduces herself and says that she likes "people, places, and things." Next up is Susan Gleever, who is a student and volunteer at the children's hospital. Leslie is taken by her. Next is a hot-to-trot Southern belle, Trish Ianetta, who has been on Youtube and loves wearing bikinis on the beach. The crowd loves her! Leslie, not so much.
The talent competition is up and Trish shows off her "baton skills" by dancing around in short shorts and sequined top -- minus twirling the baton -- but no one in the audience, especially Tom, seems to care. Tom even gets into the dance. April comes out and does an impression of her sister and one of Leslie, which Leslie takes in stride, but Tom can't stop laughing. He loves it! Susan plays the piano and everyone in the crowd seems bored, Tom starts texting but Leslie is captivated. She believes Susan is everything Miss Pawnee should be.
Mark and Ann's "second date" is going splendidly. Mark has fixed her shower, but when Ann goes to take out the trash, she spots Andy spying on her from the pit! Ann walks down and confronts Andy, who is trying to hide behind his tent screen. Andy comes out and reveals that he has been living down in the pit. Andy is full of lies! Ann, obviously upset, tells Andy how weird he is. She leaves in a hurry, knowing that Mark is still at her house fixing the shower.
During the Q and A session, Tom relentlessly hits on Trish and flirts with her. Leslie interrupts and asks Trish how "we as citizens can improve on the great experiment?" Leslie thinks she finally has stumped Trish, to prove to everyone that Susan should be the winner! But Trish wins the audience over with her fluffy answer about America and her dislike for immigrants. "It should be Our-merica, not Their-merica." The audience applauds and Leslie protests. Meanwhile, the rain pours outside and Ann and Mark have a cozy dinner. Ann stresses about Andy living in the pit, but Mark thinks they should invite Andy inside. Ann rolls her eyes and scowls; she can't believe it!
April learns there is no cash prize so she quits the contest and runs off the stage. The judges meet to deliberate, but Tom thinks that Trish, "the hot one," should win by a landslide. Every one of the judges likes Trish, but Leslie tries to sway the votes toward Susan. Leslie gives a speech about how Miss Pawnee is important and that they are all sequestered! She claims that Trish will win over her dead body. The former Miss Pawnee, Jessica, thinks Trish should win, but now Ray is having second thoughts. Leslie may get the judges to think her way after all!
Ann angrily invites Andy into her home and tells him not to drip on anything. Andy thinks there is hanky panky going on between Ann and Mark and eyes them eating their food. Andy tries to take a trip down memory lane with Ann, but it doesn't work. Andy is so not happy about Ann and Mark getting together. Leslie gives a heartwarming speech for one last chance to coerce the judges to vote for Susan. The results are in and it's "the hot one," Trish! Everyone applauds, except Leslie.
At the end of the pageant, Leslie makes a speech about all the "Susans" losing to the "Trishes" of the world. Leslie tells Trish that she did not vote for her. Leslie looks and sees Trish taking shots with other contestants like it's spring break. Mark and Ann finish their dinner with Andy. Andy wants to know if there is dessert, but Ann kicks him out and he walks into the rain, back to his tent. Andy thinks the dinner went really well!
Dave finds Leslie at the pageant and confronts her about not answering him about getting coffee. Leslie trips over her words and Dave tells her that he likes her and gives her his card. Dave stumbles out and knocks into Trish, calling her "buddy," and this makes Leslie smile. The next day, Leslie calls Dave and he comes to her office. Leslie tells Dave that she was thinking about what he said and that she would like to go out to dinner. Cheerily, Dave agrees to the date. He then proceeds to adorably point out the women on Leslie's wall: Michelle Obama and Sandra Day O'Connor. Leslie is impressed with Dave's efforts. Tom on the other hand, isn't having the same dating luck: he is giving out his house keys to women he is interested in, in hopes of them coming to his house and showering. Nothing has worked, but Tom has been robbed twice.