It's Christmas in Las Vegas. Delinda and Piper are hoping their “Naked Santa” display will win the casino charity competition, and it's certainly popular, with pretty ladies lined up to sit on buff Santa's lap. Everyone's yakking about Christmas plans. Mike is excited to hang out with his Aunt Gladys and the Pips, followed by a week of much needed vacation. When Aunt Gladys is called to entertain troops in Iraq, Mike's plans are dashed, and his Christmas spirit evaporates.
While the suckers are doing stupid Christmas stuff, Sam is planning to double her bonus, having convinced hedge fund whale Linus to spend the holiday at the Montecito. Linus surprises Sam, showing up with $2 million more than his usual bank. Mike is disgusted with Sam, and even more disgusted with Helen, who is soliciting contributions for her Homeless Outreach Center in the casino. Mike kicks Helen out, and starts repairs to the Surveillance Room, where Mitch hands him a Christmas card from Kate. Mourning his lost love, Mike offers to work Mitch's shift so he can spend the holiday with some hot twins.
When the star atop the tree in Mike's office starts shorting out, he goes to fix it, claiming he hates Christmas. Mike falls and gets knocked unconscious. When he awakens, Scrooge is speaking to him from a video monitor. Mike won't be able to move until he is visited by the three spirits of Christmas. Not until the visits have concluded will Mike's fate be decided. Meanwhile, Piper and Delinda fight off two feisty hussies, Janice and Carla, who accuse them of cutting the long line to sit on Santa's lap.
Danny tells Cooper that he has a retail slot down to two finalists, whom he's meeting today, but he hasn't decided between them yet. Cooper is going on a trail ride later, so Danny offers to give him his decision before. Cooper corrects Danny: he can recommend his decision instead of actually making it. Mike wakes up to find Sam in a wacky hot elf outfit. She's the Spirit of Christmas Past. With slaps to the head, she snaps Mike down several scenes from memory lane, which only make him feel worse than he already does.
Sam is dismayed when Linus announces that he‘s donating his $3 million to Helen's Outreach Center. She tracks Helen down and kicks her out of the casino. Sam tries to persuade Linus that gambling helps plenty of people, but he's determined to give his money to Helen later tonight before checking out. Danny receives retail finalist Bobbi, who's brought along a few hot dancers to persuade him to choose her lingerie store. Mitch calls Danny to security to meet Pramil, who pitches his tech toy store.
Sam drowns her sorrows in tequila until she gets the bright idea to check out Helen's Outreach Center to make sure it's legit. When Bobbi and Pramil start arguing, Danny orders Mitch to get them out, and runs for it. Mike wakes up to find Piper sitting next to him in a wacky hot showgirl outfit. She's the Spirit of Christmas present, and is going to show him why it's important for him to be in Vegas.
Delinda looks wildly for Mike as Janis and Carla start a girl fight and buff Santa runs off. Danny needs to find him to talk over the retail deal. Sam needs him to find dirt on the Outreach Center. Completely unaware that a pickpocket is running wild in the casino, Mitch tells Sam to go down there in person and check it out. Mike wants to catch the pickpocket, but Piper tells him his dream isn't over yet.
Michelle, a little girl, introduces herself as the Spirit of Christmas Yet to Come. Mike still feels that after five years of hard work, he's still nowhere near where he wants to be. Michelle tells him to cut himself some slack, reminding Mike that he can be whatever he wants to be. Sam reluctantly tours the Outreach Center, and everything looks legit. She is just about to hand over a considerable wad of cash for donation, when she notices the business license in the window.
With buff Santa gone, Piper and Delinda have to come up with a winning idea for the charity competition event. Michelle takes Mike to a quiet spot overlooking the city, to ask if he's willing to take the good with the bad. He asks who she is - his daughter? - but she's his possible granddaughter. Mike wants to know the identity of Michelle's grandma. She claims that it may be one of the other spirits, but she can't say. Back in the present, the Christmas tree star shorts out again and the tree catches fire as Mike dreams away
Everyone converges in security, looking for Mike. Piper smells smoke coming from his office, but the door's stuck. Danny busts through the glass and drags Mike out, and Piper gives him mouth-to-mouth. Mike finally comes around, thrilled to be awake.
Linus celebrates with Helen in preparation of handing over the $3 million, when Sam interrupts to accuse her of a classic long con. Any Vegas native would recognize that Helen's business license was fake. Helen can stay and get arrested, or Sam can take her outside and beat the crap out of her. Helen slinks off. Mortified, Linus soothes his ego at the tables, pleasing Sam.
Donning a traditional Santa suit, Danny mugs for the kids, winning the charity competition. High on life, Mike boogies through the lobby to catch the pickpocket, and return several wallets to their rightful owners. Danny invites Mike over for Christmas, but Delinda has already invited him to stop by, after a water-skiing date with Piper. The gang rips into Christmas gifts left for them under the tree by Cooper - bowling shoes stuffed with cash. Merry Christmas!