ER Episode 15.13 Love is a Battlefield

Amidst a "thrisis" (a mid-life crisis for thirtysomethings), Morris shops for a mini-van online, with the goal of luring his future wife for a dream life in the 'burbs. The gang watches TV coverage on the lottery -- five Jumbo Mart workers have won $90 million and quit their jobs. Grady's sad; he'll miss his buddy Babu and their mornings with coffee and Slim Jims.

Sixteen-year-old Jody Nugent is brought in after being hit by a car while riding her bike. She's desperate to find her bag, so Sam offers to look for it in the ambulance. Gates apologizes to Daria for the other night. He was drunk, he doesn't remember what happened. Fixing Gates' collar, Daria explains that they had sex, and then he asked her to marry him.

Stepping out of the ambulance, Sam spies Gates with Daria and instantly knows what went down. Seething, Sam returns to the ER, where Gates is treating a hirsute man with lice. Dawn runs and Tracy reels when Gates asks them to shave the guy. Elderly Barbara Feingold is wheeled in after a bathtub fall, and her husband Harry may have hurt is back trying to pick her up. Harry and Barbara bicker like old pros.

Neela is just saying goodbye to her now-healthy patient Anastasia when Brenner returns from his trip to Australia. He called Neela right when he got back, but she's been too busy. Banfield asks Neela about her interviews at Hopkins, Yale and Duke, then informs her that she'll be unreachable the rest of the day.

Jody downplays her accident, claiming she skidded on the ice. Nervous, she asks for her ringing cell phone, but no one pays attention, as the man who hit her is brought in. Jody becomes agitated to learn that Sam called her parents, whom she doesn't want to see. She begins panicking for her phone -- it's her boyfriend's ring tone. The phone is left behind as Morris sends Jody for head and belly CT scans.

Daria nervously offers to help Sam label blood vials, and then awkwardly makes friendly conversation. Sam barely controls herself, and hands off the vials when Morris calls her to help with Barbara, who's in a lot of pain. It turns out she and Harry live next door to each other, having been married and divorced three times.

Harry notices as Gates slips off to ask Sam about Alex. Meanwhile, Babu, Jumbo Mart's owner and lottery winner, comes in complaining of chest pains. It all started when they gave him the big check. Grady chalks it up to adrenaline, as Frank runs off to take advantage of free donuts all day at the Jumbo Mart.

At the gynecological clinic, Coburn finds only four healthy follicles in Banfield's ovaries. Banfield will undergo a procedure to isolate eggs for in vitro fertilization, and wants to be totally knocked out for the duration. Back in the ER, Morris spies Jody thrashing in the next trauma room, screaming for her ringing phone while Daria and Grady try to suture her forearm. When Daria loosens her grip, Jody's arm snaps up and clobbers Daria in the face.

Jody calms down after answering her phone, whimpering "I love yous" to boyfriend Tommy. Sam gloats while patching up Daria's eye. After asking if Daria is single, Sam offers to set her up with a secret admirer amongst the staff. Daria promises to think about it. Meanwhile, Jody apologizes to Morris for freaking out about her phone. When boyfriend Tommy bursts in, Morris senses something isn't quite right.

During his exam, Harry asks Gates about Sam, while Barbara regales Sam with scenes from her three marriages. Harry and Barbara were first married 50 years ago. Barbara was stubborn, hot-headed and hot, kinda like Sam, and she caught Harry cheating on her with his secretary. When you know you know, and you can't help what the heart wants. Despite all their history, both Barbara and Harry declare their relationship over.

Gates asks Sam to talk, but she blows him off. Frank comments that Neela could be a millionaire if she still worked at Jumbo Mart, a fact Neela would have preferred Brenner didn't hear. If he won the lottery, Brenner would see the seven wonders of the world, and live in a house by the ocean. Prone to seasickness, Neela would invest her lottery dough and not loan any to Brenner when he spent all his.

Sam bumps into Daria, claiming she gave the secret admirer Daria's number. They're "friends," so Sam has to ask Daria an awkward question: Is Gates dating anyone? Daria denies all knowledge, and Sam pretends relief. Can you imagine? If Gates was screwing someone who worked at the ER, it would just be too cruel.

Morris is nervous and excited when his ex-patient, sexy Latina cop Claudia, shows up to interview Jody and the driver. Jody has no drugs or alcohol in her system, and Morris has assumed that the driver was speeding and ran a light, but Claudia thinks it's Jody's fault. They enter Jody's room just as Tommy is up in her face, demanding to know where she was going at the time of the accident.

Tommy doesn't want to leave the room, but Claudia insists, then asks Jody why several witnesses saw her ride deliberately into traffic. Agitated, Jody claims she doesn't remember, and Tommy returns to cut the questioning short. Meanwhile, Banfield and Russell discuss her procedure. Banfield is prickly, but Russell assures her they'll take it one step at a time.

Morris offers Claudia a coffee, and then fills her cup full of too much sugar and creamer like a nervous schoolboy. Charmed, Claudia offers Morris her card. If anything happens with Jody, Morris should call her. Or he can just call. Frustrated that all's not right with Jody, Morris resolves to call for a psych consult, just as her parents finally arrive. Agitated, Mr. Nugent demands to see his daughter.

Gates finds Sam in the break room. He doesn't want to give up on them, having realized they have something worth saving. Sam wonders if he made the realization before or after he had sex with Daria. Gates claims it was a mistake, but Sam is convinced he'll never change. When Daria walks in, Sam claims she's all done with Gates, Daria can have him.

Just before her procedure, Banfield tells Russell that if it's bad news, she only wants to hear it from him. Barbara's pulse plunges and she becomes hypertensive. Brenner and Neela step in, teaming elegantly together to find and repair the source of internal bleeding. The crisis brings Barbara and Harry's hearts back together.

Morris finds Grady releasing Jody to her parents, since she passed her psych test. Morris pulls Mr. Nugent aside to ask if anything's going on. Mr. Nugent admits that Jody has isolated herself since she met Tommy. When Tommy insists on spending the evening chillin' with Jody, Mr. Nugent puts his foot down. Jody seems like she's about to confess something to Morris, but Tommy interrupts.

Babu returns, fearing his hand is broken, since people have been shaking it all day. When Grady explains that Babu's presenting anxiety over winning the lottery as pain, Baby realizes he likes his life and hates change. What's he gonna do with all that money? On a hunch, Morris drives to Jody's house, only to find that Claudia and the EMTs are already there. Mr. Nugent is in handcuffs, Jody is in shock, and Tommy pretty close to dead.

Claudia explains that Tommy showed up to attack Jody, and Mr. Nugent stepped in. Sam has a heart to heart with Chuny. How could Gates do this to her? The same thing happened to Chuny, and she was real mad, but eventually realized the guy wasn't right for her. She knows Sam still loves Gates. Babu returns to the hospital with no more pain. He's figured it out, and bought a yacht, which he'll pick up in Greece tomorrow. Grady and Babu share a heartfelt goodbye over Slim Jims.

When Banfield wakes up, Russell sadly informs her they have no viable eggs. After work, Daria invites Gates for drinks or dinner. He explains that although it was fun once, it's not going to happen again. It's not over with Sam yet, at least not for him. When Neela avoids him, Brenner chases her out the door. He calls her out for acting weird, and she confesses that she really likes him and wants to be with him. Neela gives Brenner an opportunity to gloat, but he prefers kissing in the middle of the sidewalk.