Better Off Ted Episode 2.09 The Long and Winding High Road

Pete Gilroy runs Veridian's other Research and Development department. Pete's team has always been in heated competition with Ted's team. This is evident as the two development squads try to woo the big boss with a product dubbed the "Dream Glider." It's a magnetized outfit that allows the wearer to hover off the ground. Pete criticizes Ted's version because the magnets on his vest look like breasts. Ted says Pete's pants-like version looks like a diaper.

Ted wants to figure out a way to get along with Pete. He asks Phil and Lem to see if they can make some improvements to Pete's design. But Pete is less than receptive to the goodwill gesture. So the gloves are off as Ted vows to take Pete down. May the best magnetized diaper or boob-vest win!

Phil and Lem want Ted to ask the company to fix the lab thermostat that they accidentally broke during a random piñata incident. Ted wants them to take the high road and own up to their blunder. That's not gonna happen. The boys in white opt to sweat it out in an overheated lab until someone else reports this most unpleasant work environment. That's not gonna happen either. Time for Plan B.

Phil and Lem trick a coworker named Patricia into thinking she broke the thermostat. The plan works, but Patricia doesn't want to report it to management either. She decides to pay for the repair with her own money. This has Lem and Phil feeling guilty, though not guilty enough to come clean.

When Patricia reveals that the only way she can afford the repair is by sleeping with an ex-boyfriend/handyman, Phil and Lem finally fess up. Now the only way Patricia won't report them is by forcing Phil and Lem to fight each other. That's not gonna happen. Wait, yes it is. Phil decks Lem with a sweet sucker punch. Problem solved.

Linda thinks Veronica doesn't respect her. Ted says she just can't relate to someone who always wants to do the right thing. So when Veronica needs someone to make sure Pete's magnet pants test badly, Linda suggests they manipulate the focus group. They need to make sure one person in the test group is relentlessly negative. Since the product is being tested by children, they decide to recruit Ted's daughter, Rose, as their mole.

Veronica tells Rose to dismiss any positive comments about the product with a derisive laugh. Unfortunately, Rose isn't sure what derisive means. Frankly, we had to look it up ourselves. Meanwhile, Ted figures out a way to make sure his Dream Glider is introduced before Pete's. Unfortunately, he doesn't share that little tidbit with Veronica and Linda. So when the product tester unveils their vest first, Rose has nothing nice to say.

The project is now dead and Ted can't believe that Veronica and Linda used his daughter as a pawn in their plan of deceit. They, in turn, can't believe that Ted conned the product tester into switching up the batting order. Ted feels there's a lesson to be learned here. Always take the high road. Veronica disagrees. She believes they just have to coordinate better while on the low road, which brings us to the company's tagline of the moment:

Veridian Dynamics - Right and Wrong. It means something. We just don't know what.