January 26, 2010 07:00:32 GMT
After her husband lost his life two years ago, Corinne Bailey Rae was devastated, admitting that she stayed away from spotlight and didn't want to listen to music.
British soul singer Corinne Bailey Rae refused to listen to music or spend any time alone for a year after her husband's tragic death in 2008. The "Put Your Records On" hitmaker was devastated when 31-year-old saxophonist Jason Rae was found dead in an apartment in Leeds, England, with traces of cocaine and ecstasy in his blood.
The singer shied away from the spotlight and admits she was so overwhelmed by her grief behind closed doors that she couldn't pick up her guitar, write or listen to music without wanting to "destroy" everything in her home. She explains, "I didn't hear anything. Nothing came in. It's hard to explain. (All I wanted to do) was destroy things. I felt so much had sort of been... destroyed. I guess I can't lie about stuff, so there it is. You can't play it down. I felt extremely, extremely destructive, and I've never felt that before."
She insists, "I was really sad. I was really nervous. I didn't want to go to any airports. I didn't want to go anywhere on my own. I didn't want to be in the house on my own. I needed people around me, constant people. I couldn't make any plans - I couldn't even imagine the next day. It's an awful time - you can't do anything. It's possibly an endless time. That's all you can see, time."
The 30 year old is currently preparing to release her second album, "The Sea", which was partially inspired by her partner's death. She adds, "Even at this particular point right now, I don't feel like (Rae's death) actually happened. At other times I can feel it much more. I feel totally destroyed. I feel totally cut off from my favorite person in the world."
She continues, "But I just feel like this is the right time (to release the album). I definitely don't want to be seen as like, 'Oh, wow, she's soldiering on!' Because I don't feel like I am. At this particular point, I'm finding it to be the right thing to do."