The 'Fetish' singer gets real about her journey to recovery, saying that going to rehab during her 90-day break a year ago was daunting.
- Aug 4, 2017
AceShowbiz - Selena Gomez graced the cover of InStyle's latest issue and she talked about her recent hiatus. The singer/actress took a timeout from the spotlight a year ago to seek help for dealing with the side effects of lupus, which can include anxiety, depression and panic attacks.
"It's so weird, how one year can change everything," she said. "Last year I canceled my tour and went away for 90 days, and it was the best thing that I ever could've done. I had no phone, nothing, and I was scared. But it was amazing, and I learned a lot."
She continued, "Everything I cared about, I stopped caring about. I came out, and it felt like, 'OK, I can only go forward.' And there are still days. I go to therapy. I believe in that and talking about where you are. But I'm in a really, really healthy place."
Of returning to red carpet after rehab, she said, "I was in the countryside and never did my hair; I took part in equine therapy, which is so beautiful. And it was hard, obviously. But I knew what my heart was saying, and I thought, 'OK, I think this has helped me become stronger for other people." When I came out, I was asked to go to the American Music Awards, and everyone around me was like, 'Do whatever makes you comfortable.' I didn't want my fans to have a negative view of taking care of yourself, so I just went in head-on, and I'll tell you, the first time stepping on that carpet was so overwhelming. I felt like my back was sweating."
When asked about criticims and haters, she replied, "Of course I care, but I care less and less, and that's so freeing. My livelihood can't depend on 'Am I liked?' When I was on Disney, it was like, 'Oh, they didn't like it?' It hurts your feelings."
She also said, "Because of social media, because of all the pressure that girls have, it's so difficult. It's good to be connected, to see things, and to get a sense of what your friends are up to. But it also allows people to think they need to look or be a certain way."
Selena also talked about her boyfriend The Weeknd. "I don't depend on one area of my life to make me happy. It's really important for me to love and nourish my friends and family and to make sure that I never get influenced by a guy. I've wanted to be in a strong head space for years, and I really wasn't. Before, I was so young and easily influenced, and I'd feel insecure. You want someone to add to your life, not to complete you, if that makes sense," she said. "I'm lucky because he's more of a best friend than anything else."
