April 11, 2014 06:37:26 GMT
The 'Locke' star also talks about drug use in an interview for May issue of the magazine, saying, 'I couldn't value life until I risk losing something worth more to me than my behavior.'
Tom Hardy ditches his shirt when making an appearance on the cover of Esquire's May issue. The London-born star, who is popular for his roles in "Inception", "The Dark Knight Rises" and "Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy" among others, sports some beard while staring at the camera. In an interview published on the edition, the 36-year-old actor talks about some topics including his view of manliness and drug abuse.
"I don't feel very manly," the "Locke" star shares. "I have always been frightened with men. To the point where I couldn't go into a gym because of the testosterone and I felt weak." He continues talking, "I don't feel rugged and strong and capable in real life, not how I imagine a man ought to be. So I seek it, to mimic it and maybe understand it, or maybe to draw it into my own reality."
Speaking of drug abuse, Hardy has some words to share. "I was a shameful suburban statistic. I was told very clearly, 'You go down that road, Tom, you won't come back. That's it. All you need to know.' And that message stayed with me very clearly for the rest of my days," he tells the magazine.
"The beginning, really, of a new life. I couldn't value life until I risk losing something worth more to me than my behavior. I am f**king lucky to be here, to be honest," he says further. "Any near-death experience - if you're lucky enough to f**king realize that it is one - is going to leave an indelible mark on you. And then you add shame and guilt and fear into that, it's a recipe for awareness if you have the ability to become aware from it. And good things can come back into your life."