November 13, 2012 03:23:58 GMT
The 'Mean' hitmaker insists she is not the type of over-controlling girlfriend, explaining, 'If I feel too much like I'm wearing the pants, I start to feel uncomfortable, and then we break up.'
Having her fair share of high-profile breakups in the public eye, Taylor Swift says her past relationship has taught her how to make a relationship work. Unlike in her professional career where she's in total control of every decision, the 22-year-old country/pop singer chooses to hand over the reins to her man when she's in a relationship.
"It needs to be equal. If I feel too much like I'm wearing the pants, I start to feel uncomfortable, and then we break up," she says in the latest issue of Harper's Bazaar. "It's wonderful to hand over the reins to your boyfriend when you control so much of these big, high-pressure decisions, you know? That is a huge defining factor in who you choose to be with."
When a relationship sours, Taylor copes with her heartache by turning to music. "Some combinations of people are toxic, you know? You have to find the right one that isn't just going to explode into fiery ash and destruction," she explains. "Despite all of that and how unpleasant it is, as a writer you get a lot from it. It's a crazy justification system. You know that guy you really wish you could erase from your memory? But then the answer is track six, eight, 12, and 13."
Another thing that helps is avoiding gossips. "What I had to learn to do, in order to maintain a general happiness in my life, was to stop reading everything," she opens up. "It gets really bad if you go through a breakup and those blogs have these polls asking, 'Who should they date next?' And you're just sitting there staring at the laptop bawling."
While she's not comfortable of wearing the pants in a relationship, she also literally doesn't like to wear them in daily basis. "There's just something so feminine about a dress," she insists. "Whether it's a summertime dress that makes me feel carefree, an evening cocktail dress that makes me feel fancy or a vintage dress that makes me feel like a '50s housewife - which I enjoy feeling like, for some reason - I just really like dresses."
Although she loves dresses, Taylor is not really comfortable of having tons of clothes and shopping for new ones. As a public figure, she doesn't have much choice as explaining, "I'm in a predicament where I can't wear a dress twice or else it's pointed out in magazines. So unfortunately I have to shop for dresses all the time."
Of having complete control of her career, she says it's a necessity. "When I'm in management meetings when we're deciding my future, those decisions are left up to me," she says. "I'm the one who has to go out and fulfill all these obligations, so I should be able to choose which ones I do or not. That's the part of my life where I feel most in control."
While she couldn't trust tabloids, she could always rely on her friends like Emma Stone and Selena Gomez for support. The girl, who's linked to Joe Jonas, Taylor Lautner, Jake Gyllenhaal, John Mayer and Conor Kennedy in the past, says, "We never talk about fashion, about career, about our ambitions or our projects. We just talk about relationships, feelings, love and boys."