June 27, 2011 05:11:36 GMT
Since he was not able to express his feelings at Ryan's memorial service, the co-creator of 'Jackass' writes his latest blog post in memory of his co-star's humor, kindness and capacity to love.
Johnny Knoxville's world has gotten a little less funny after Ryan Dunn tragically died in a car accident last Monday, June 20. The co-creator of "Jackass" opened up about his memory of his friend and co-star in his latest blog post on his website since he was not able to get through talking at the late daredevil's memorial service on Wednesday, June 22.
"I walked to the podium and tried to share memories of my dear friend, but the words were just spinning in my head," the 40-year-old recalled. "What came out were the mumblings of a man trying his best not to cry, and I wasn't even successful at that. I didn't break down, because I knew Angie or his family didn't need to see that, but I also didn't get to properly convey what Ryan meant to me."
Johnny went on to write the things he wished he could have told everyone then. "I felt 34-percent funnier when I was with Ryan, but I guess everyone did," he wrote. "He had such a hair trigger laugh reflex. He lived his life wanting to laugh and wanting you to laugh with him. He would cackle really fucking loud, too, and it wasn't uncommon that he would fall over from it. Sometimes I would fall with him because his spirit was very contagious."
"He wasn't incapable of seriousness, though. Ryan was a great listener. If you were having troubles, he was always someone you could go sit down and talk to. Granted, most of our sitting down was actually standing up playing pool together, but he was always there if you were sad about something. That's why all this is even harder because right now I really need to talk to him but I can't."
Johnny also remembered Ryan's "enormous capacity to love". He noted, "His friends and family got a lot, but a lion's share of that went to his sweet and beautiful Angie. If he wasn't with her he would be talking about her." He went on to praise the 34-year-old for his loyalty, adding "sometimes that bit him in the ass."
He concluded the post by writing, "You'll have to excuse me, I'm just very sad because I lost my brother and my world got about 134-percent less funny. I don't know what else to say right now, so I will close with I love you, Ryan. I have a lot of emotions swirling, but I want you to know I love you so very much."